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30 août Ten Distorted Thinking PatternsI'm going to borrow from The Feeling Good Handbook here and share these ten distorted thought patterns. If you're like me, thinking this way can lead to alot of trouble for you. I know that I am guilty of these all the time. It's a huge part of my problem, and often leads me to feeling more depressed. In turn I then use bad coping skills to deal with the emotional overflow. So the next time you're stressed out, maybe try looking at your thought patterns. That's what Cognative Behavioral Therapy is about anyways. Think of it like a triangle: your thoughts at one point, your feelings at another, and your behavior at the last point. The way it works is: your thoughts affect your feelings, your feelings your behavior, and your behavior your thoughts. You can put the three in any order, but any way you put them they all affect each other. Now I've been told that we really don't have much control over our feelings, but we do have control over our thoughts and behaviors. Changing the last two from negative to positive can have a very good affect on your negative feelings. So, here are ten negative ways in which we may think, that can lead to negative feelings:
1. All-or-nothing thinking: "You see things in black-or-white catagories. If a
a situation falls short of perfect, you see it as a total failure."
ex. You eat a spoonful of ice cream while on a diet, and then tell yourself that
you've completely blown your diet. This could lead to binge.
2. Overgeneralization: "You see a single negative event, such as a romantic
rejection or a career reversal, as a never-ending pattern of defeat by
using words such as 'always' and 'never' when you think about it."
ex. They didn't call me back for an interview. I'll never get a job.
3. Mental Filter: "You pick out a single negative detail and dwell on it
exclusively, so that your vision of reality becomes darkened, like the drop of
ink that discolors a beaker of water."
ex.You recieve alot of praise for an assignment you did, but someone says
something mildly critical. You obsess about the criticism and ignore the
praise.
4. Discounting the Positive: "You reject positive experiences by insisting
they 'don't count'."
ex. If you do a good job, you may tell yourself that you could of done better
or that anyone could have done as well.
5. Jumping to Conclusions: "You interpret things negatively when there are
no facts to support your conclusion":
Mind-Reading-- Without checking it out, you arbitrarily conclude that
someone is reacting negatively to you.
Forune Telling-- You predict that things will go badly. An example would be
telling yourself your going to flunk a test before you even
take it.
6. Magnification: "You exaggerate the importance of your problems and
shortcomings, or you minimize the importance of your desirable qualities.
7. Emotional Reasoning: "You assume that your negative emotions
necessarily reflect the way things really are."
ex. "I feel guilty, I must be a terrible person."
8. Should Statements: "You tell yourself that things should be the way you
hoped or expected them to be. Musts, oughts, and have to's are similiar
offenders. Should statements directed against yourself lead to guilt and
frustration. Should statements directed agains other people or the world
in general lead to anger and frustration."
9. Labeling: "Labeling is an extreme form of all-or-nothing thinking. Instead of
saying 'I made a mistake,' you attach a negative label to yourself: 'I'm a
loser.' These labels are just useless abstractions that lead to anger, anxiety,
frustration, and low self-esteem."
"You may also label others. Then you feel that the problem is with that
person's character instead of with their thinking or behavior. This makes you
feel hostile and hopeless about improving things and leaves little room for
communication."
10. Personalization and Blame: "Personalization occurs when you hold
yourself personally responsible for an event that isn't entirely under your
control. This leads to guilt, shame, and feelings of inadequacy."
ex. Your child is having difficulties in school, so you tell yourself 'this shows
what a bad mother I am.'
"Some people do the opposite. They blame other people or their
circumstances for their problems, and they overlook ways that they might
be contributing to the problem. Blame usually doesn't work very well
because other people resent being scapegoated and they will toss the blame
right back in your lap."
Well that's all of them. Hopefully if you read them, you can start to better understand where some of your negative feelings come from. As with all things, this kind of work and understanding comes with practice. So maybe just try taking a minute out your schedule to reflect on what it is that could be making you feel so down. Once you identify the negative thought, try countering it with a more realistic positive one. For instance:
" I'm nervous about applying for a job, so obviously it will be a horrible experience." Instead I could try thinking. "It's normal to be a bit nervous when applying for a job. If I don't get it, hopefully it will better prepare me for the next interview. Eventually I will find a job."
That's it for now, hope you find this bit of information helpful. If you'd like to know more about Cognitive Behavorial Therapy check out The Feeling Good Handbook by David D. Burns. www.feelinggood.com His website has links to other sites that discuss CBT.
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